6/17/09 – On Wednesday, I woke up feeling fine – no contractions and the baby was acting like his normal, happy, squirmy self. By the time I got to work, I started having contractions and I could feel them, but I wouldn't say they really hurt, just a very mild cramping. I started timing them and they were coming every 5 to 20 minutes. I figured it was just false labor and went about my business. I met with my boss to go over some of the work I was passing along to her during my maternity leave and she noticed that I was having contractions so we started timing them. It was so funny – we would do a little work, stop and time a contraction and then go back to the work. At this point, it was about 1PM and then contractions were coming about every 5 minutes but still, they were very tolerable. I kept thinking, “there's no way this could be labor because it just doesn't hurt enough!” Thankfully, my boss Kahane, who has two kids, made me call the doctor after an hour or so. I went into their office to meet with Jeanne (my favorite NP/midwife) and she hooked me up to a monitor. Vince joined me at the doctor's office right after I got there. My contractions were still coming every 5 minutes and so Jeanne did an internal exam – 4 cm dilated and 80% effaced!
I still kept thinking, “There's no way this is labor!” (wow, can you believe the denial happening here?) but Vince and I went home and took showers and packed up for the hospital. We called our parents and my sister and told them all, “it's time!” even though I still kept doubting. By the time we got home to our apartment, the contractions really started to hurt so I think this is when I first started to believe that we were going to have a baby soon. I called and texted all of my friends and family and we headed for the hospital.
Once we got to Columbia Presbyterian, we checked in and were sent to triage. I was checked by a resident who said I was still 4cm dilated, but I didn't even feel him do the check so I am still convinced I was further along at this point. My contractions were really starting to get intense and I was ready for an epidural! I tried my best to breathe through the contractions and we hung out in triage, waiting for a room to open up in labor and delivery. The hours ticked by slowly. We arrived at 5:30 and by 8:30, I was in a good amount of pain but we still didn't have a room in labor and delivery. At about 9PM I was making really loud noises with every contraction just trying to make it through them (they were coming every 3 minutes or so at this point) and Vince went to tell them we really needed to get this show on the road NOW. At 9:30 they finally moved us to labor and delivery. We met Joey, our fabulous labor and delivery nurse and about 15 minutes later, the epidural anesthesiologist showed up. By that point, I had started to have back labor and spasms in my back and my contractions were coming almost on top of each other – one wouldn't end completely before the next would start. When the anesthesiologist walked into the room, I almost cried b/c I was SO HAPPY to see her!!!
After the epidural was started, I was so relieved. I just felt so much better and was so happy. The doctor came in to check me and I was 8cm dilated and in transition – I had almost made it the whole way on my own! I really do think that if I hadn't had back labor and with a bit more preparation, I could have made it the whole way with no epidural.
Once they administered the epidural, my contractions slowed down so they hooked me up to pitocin to keep them going. We could watch them happening on the monitor but thank God, I couldn't feel them! The one thing I did feel, however, was my water breaking right around midnight. I was laying on the bed resting and just suddenly felt this big warm gush of water. Vince went to get nurse Joey and she came back to check me. Sure enough – my water had broken!
Soon after, my sister and parents showed up. I was so happy that everyone had made it, just in the nick of time! Right after everyone got there, they checked me again at about 1:30AM and I was 10 cm – fully dilated. Joey, our wonderful nurse, suggested that I “let the baby do as much work as possible” before I started pushing and just let him keep moving down further and further on his own. Basically, I just hung out and felt a lot of “rectal pressure” which meant that that baby was moving closer and closer to being born.
Finally, after about an hour or so, it was time to push. Vince and my Mom stayed in the room with me and my Dad and sister waited out in the waiting room. Joey, our nurse, was there the whole time. Every time I had a contraction, I pushed for 3 sets of 10 seconds. It was very hard and because of the epidural, it was hard to tell if I was making progress. Sure enough, after about a half an hour, Joey and my Mom and Vince could see the baby's head and told that he had a full head of dark hair! Joey got a mirror so I could see what progress I was making and I have to tell you, that was just the craziest thing to watch his little head come down a little bit and then disappear again when I stopped pushing, just like a little turtle going back into his shell. After a while I stopped watching the mirror and just starting watching the looks on Vince and my Mom's faces. Every time I got closer, I could see their eyes light up and knew I was getting this little baby headed in the right direction!
Joey had told us that the goal was to get the baby's head past the pubic bone so that he wouldn't slip back when I stopped pushing. As soon as we started getting close to that point, she went to get the doctor. The attending physician, Dr. Miller was in a c-section delivery but our baby was ready to come now so our resident doctor, Dr. Cort from the night before, came in to deliver the baby. It only took a couple more pushes after he got into the room before I was crowning and I could see by the tears in my Mom's and Vince's eyes that we were going to have a baby very soon! I had been so convinced that I was going to have a c-section that it wasn't until I was crowning that I thought, “Oh my gosh, I am going to push this baby out!” On one of my last pushes before the baby was out, I look in the mirror and saw most of Roman's head – it was an amazing sight to see!
Dr. Cort asked Vince if he was going to cut the umbilical cord and Vince said yes. I pushed one more time and the baby's head was out. Dr. Cort said he was going to have to cut the cord himself and I asked him if that meant that that cord was wrapped around the baby's neck. It was, but it was just once and Roman's vital signs were great so thank God it wasn't affecting him. After I pushed the head out, Dr. Cort asked me to push nice and slow and I knew he was delivering the shoulders. In just a couple of seconds, at 4:43AM on 6/18/09, Roman Vincent Camillo came into the world! Because the umbilical cord had been wrapped around his neck he came out blue and not breathing, which was scary but I knew they just needed to stimulate him a little to get him going. Sure enough, less than a minute or so after being born, we heard a beautiful cry coming from Roman's little bed in our room. Roman was healthy and here!
The doctor guessed that he felt like a 9lber and he was very close – Roman weighed in at an impressive 8lb 12oz and was 21.5 inches in length. His APGAR scores were 8 and 9. Thank goodness he arrived 10 days early or he would have been over 9.5 pounds at 40 weeks!
After they got the baby cleaned up and handed him to me, I just can't tell you how overwhelmed with emotion I was. I just could not believe, and still can't believe, that I get to be this perfect little baby's mama. He is just the most beautiful, calm, charming, expressive and wonderful little bundle of joy that I have ever laid eyes on and I couldn't be any luckier that he picked me and Vince to be his parents. I am just overjoyed. Every time I look at him I think about this passage I read almost three years ago when Vince and I first realized we were having trouble getting pregnant:
"What do I think God meant when he gave me infertility?
"I think he meant for my husband and I to grow closer, become stronger, love deeper. I think God meant for us to find the fortitude within ourselves to get up every time infertility knocks us down. I think God meant for our medical community to discover medicines, invent medical equipment, create procedures and protocols. I think God meant for us to find a cure for infertility.
"No, God never meant for me not to have children. That's not my destiny; that's just a fork in the road I'm on. I've been placed on the road less traveled, and, like it or not, I'm a better person for it. Clearly, God meant for me to develop more compassion, deeper courage, and greater inner strength on this journey to resolution, and I haven't let him down.
"Frankly, if the truth be known, I think God has singled me out for a
special treatment. I think God meant for me to build a thirst for a
child so strong and so deep that when that baby is finally placed in my
arms, it will be the longest, coolest, most refreshing drink I've ever
known.
"While I would never choose infertility, I can not deny that a fertile woman could never know the joy that awaits me. Yes, one way or another, I will have a baby of my own. And the next time someone wants to offer me unsolicited advice I'll say, "Don't tell me what God meant when he handed me infertility. I already know."
My little beautiful boy Roman is truly the longest, coolest, most refreshing drink I have ever known and I can't wait to drink in every moment of his life as I watch him grow up. I am the luckiest mama on earth!
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